Oh my sister, what is it you seek?

Oh my dear sister, what is it you truly seek?
What do you desperately yearn to possess by next week?

Oh my dear sister, what is it you truly seek?
Let’s discover it before all becomes bleak

Oh my dear sister, is it Honour that you truly seek?
Is that it when you are academically at the highest peak?

Is it truly Honour you feel when you get your bachelor’s certificate on the stage?
Or is that when you earn your first wage?

Do you need more and more degrees to get it all?
Aren’t the Masters and the P.H.D certificates enough on the wall?

Oh my dear sister, is it Honour that you truly seek?
By being born into a noble family and getting married into one which is unique?

Oh my dear sister, if it is the real Honour that you yearn for
Know that it is only being through the servant of Allah, as Islam tells us so

It is when you are seated with the Most Honorable in Paradise
This is when you will most appreciate it and fully realize

Oh my dear sister, is it Beauty that you truly seek?
By bombarding on layers of makeup and eyebrows tweak?

Is it the fancy clothes, white pearls and high heels that show your Beauty?
Aren’t you tired of competing for every man’s attention when you are off-duty?

In this dunya, do the see-through tops and tight jeans give you an edge in this race of ‘I am attractive than her’?
In the Jannah, you will have no rival and would be the most beautiful of all the hoor-ul-ayn got together!

Oh my dear sister, is it the real inner Peace and Harmony that you seek?
Does the blasting music through the headphones drown the feelings of unrest, as a technique?

Does the excessive social life and the late nights means you no longer have to find yourself anymore?
Even in a quiet room, you can’t shut down all the inner noise, when that’s all you want at the core!

Oh my dear sister, if Sukoon and Tranquility is what you are looking for
Flee back to Allah; prostrating with humility is how you will open the Serenity door!

 

Be unique. Be outstanding. Be different. Be Yourself.

Be That Woman.

Be comfortable with who you are. It’s not easy and others around you won’t make it easy either. You are who you are. You can either learn to accept it or feel restless in your own skin, for a long time until you accept it.

You are beautiful. Sure, you may not have the ‘perfect’ flawless skin, the hour glass figure, or the ‘hot smile’. Yet it is You. It is you that defines who you are. It is time to stop looking through other’s eyes. It is time to stop looking through your friends’ eyes. It is time to stop looking through your husband’s eyes. If you keep looking though his eyes, you will get tired soon. Tired to compete with all those supermodels out there. Or more realistically, tired to compete with that average looking woman out there who happens to have a ‘nicer body figure’ than you.

Pick up your confidence from the floor. Pick up your self-esteem from the floor. You are the one in charge. You are the one who decides what beauty means, for your own self. No one has the right to decide it for you.

Realistically, good men, and your man is most likely a good man, know that those photo shopped women are just that – photoshopped. He isn’t comparing you to them. He knows what counts – the inside or the outside. He appreciates your deen, your manners, your personality and essentially what makes you YOU. Believe that. Not because of him, but because it is the right thing for your own self esteem. Sure, from time to time, your man will think, and perhaps it might even slip out, ‘that is one fit’ woman, or ‘she has a good body’, or ‘it was so difficult to lower my gaze from her’ but that is in that moment. Let it go. Don’t let her define your own sense of beauty. Dont let anyone define your own sense of beauty.

You have a choice at that time. You can look at that woman, start mentally comparing yourself with her, and trying to find out what is it about her your partner finds attractive. You can allow yourself to feel your confidence drop and start questioning all the reasons why he is with you instead of her. OR you can let it go. Sure, he is having a (rather questionable) moment, definitely an uncomfortable moment for you, but just a moment nevertheless. Your relationship, your marriage is much stronger than the moment. Let him return his gaze back to you, and you will find all the answers in his eyes. The reasons why he married you, chooses to stay with her than anyone else. Be patient in that moment, calm those nerves of yours, and let yourself feel your inner strength.

Remind yourself that you are who you are and you are comfortable being yourself. It is not something we are born with. We have to learn this. Practice this every chance you get. But there is something extremely fascinating and attractive in a woman who knows who she is, and is happy in her own skin. Be that woman. Be that woman for your own self. It is worth it.